The Mind of a Child

[00:00:00] Leslie Corbell: Hello, I'm Leslie Dudley Corbell. And I'm Diane Doucette Matthews, welcome to the Mind of a Child.

We are so glad you've joined us for today's conversation. Diane, what are we gonna talk about today? We're gonna talk about

[00:00:19] Diane Matthews: some tips for, uh, helping your children get through something that may be real different, meeting new people, new experiences. And then we're gonna talk about traditions, talk about favorite foods.

So it's just gonna be a, a joy for us to do this one. So let's get started with. A verse.

[00:00:38] Leslie Corbell: Psalm 1 0 7, verse one. Give thanks to the Lord for he is good, for his mercy is everlasting. That's a good one to start

[00:00:49] Diane Matthews: with because we wanna give thanks to him every day, but this is the season just to remember about giving Thanks.

What's something that you're thankful for this year, Leslie? Well

[00:00:59] Leslie Corbell: [00:01:00] immediately I'm thankful for this past weekend, Madeline got engaged. Mm. And you know that's something that you pray for your children, that your child will find someone that God's preparing the heart of someone for them. And so if we feel very blessed with this young man and just the life that they want to have together, very Christ-centered marriage.

And it was really special on Sunday 'cause he was up here visiting and my son and his girlfriend came and we went to church with Madeline, where she goes to church. You never get tired of sitting with your children on the same pew and worshiping. That's something to be thankful

[00:01:34] Diane Matthews: for. Mm-hmm.

[00:01:35] Leslie Corbell: That's,

[00:01:36] Diane Matthews: that's so exciting.

I mean, I know I use that word a lot, but that really, really is, I know three of my kids are married and just that, that special time of planning the wedding and then the wedding itself. Oh, thank you for sharing that. Uh, something that I'm thankful for is, uh, we are going into retirement. And we sold our dental practice this year.

My husband Hank, is [00:02:00] slowing down. Mm-hmm. So we have more time together and we're traveling a little bit more. So I'm really thankful for this new season. So we're gonna play a little game. Oh boy. Are you ready?

[00:02:10] Leslie Corbell: I'm ready. Okay. I didn't bring any sneakers or tennis

[00:02:14] Diane Matthews: shoes. No. No sneakers? Nope. Okay. This is just a fun game.

So. The Mayflower arrived in America in 1620. What year was the first Thanksgiving celebration? Now don't, don't say yet. Was it in 16 20 17, 76 or was it in 1621?

[00:02:40] Leslie Corbell: Well. I'm gonna go with, they probably didn't get it together in 1620, so I'm gonna go with, give them a year to settle in 1621.

[00:02:51] Diane Matthews: Yay. First answer, right?

Okay. Second question. What were they celebrating? Were they celebrating Christmas? [00:03:00] The harvest that they just got? Or somebody's birthday.

[00:03:04] Leslie Corbell: I'm gonna go with the harvest. Very good. I was, yes. I've seen that play in in all of my elementary school years, and the pilgrims and the

[00:03:14] Diane Matthews: people listening. You can see that you can do this with your children.

Yes. This is a game that you can play with your children, just for them to understand the history. So here we go. How long do you think the celebration lasted? Three hours. Three days? Or three weeks. I'm gonna go with three days. Leslie? Yes. You must have read the history. Yes. You just know exactly how this went about.

This is great. Three for three. Okay. Now this one's a little tricky. 143 people attended the celebration. So were there more pilgrims there or more Indians there? I'm gonna go with. Indians, you are [00:04:00] correct? Yes. Wow. That's right. There were 90 American Indians and there are 53 pilgrims. Okay. Was Turkey, Buffalo seafood or deer served at the first Thanksgiving.

Oh, okay. You can pick two. Two of these were served as the main course.

[00:04:22] Leslie Corbell: I'm, I'm gonna go with seafood. Okay. And. Venison or deer. You are correct. Wow. Okay. So Turkey was not served at the first Thanksgiving? I didn't know that. Did you not know that? No. That just, okay. I had to kind of reason that. Okay. Reason it just produce it.

Okay. Yeah.

[00:04:39] Diane Matthews: Turkey didn't become the main meal until the 18 hundreds because it was native and there was, there were just so many, and it was a large enough bird to feed so many people. So it, it didn't really start being the main meal or the traditional, the, the main part of the tradition until the 18 hundreds.

[00:05:00] Oh, I'm okay. That's another

[00:05:01] Leslie Corbell: thing I'm thankful for. What I love Turkey. I do too. I let's, I love having Turkey at my Thanksgiving meal, so I'm so thankful that they started at this. I know. And I love good gravy,

[00:05:12] Diane Matthews: but, okay, so next question, and you can omit to that, we're not served at the first. Celebration.

Thanksgiving celebration. Okay. Green bean casserole, corn, pumpkin, mashed potatoes, fruit and seafood. You can emit to. I'm going to emit You want me to read them again? Green bean casserole. Okay. Green bean casserole and I think fruit.

Oh, what wrong? It was mashed potatoes. Oh, yes. They didn't have mashed potatoes. Well, that was the other one I thought about. Okay. And then this is just a fun fact. This sounds so delicious, and I think I might try to make it this year. For dessert, they would hollow out a pumpkin, add goats, milk, [00:06:00] spices, and honey, and put it in the ashes of the fire, and it would make a custard, and that's what they would eat for dessert.

[00:06:08] Leslie Corbell: Well, that sounds

[00:06:09] Diane Matthews: good. Does that sounds so yummy.

[00:06:11] Leslie Corbell: I like anything pumpkin.

[00:06:12] Diane Matthews: I know, me, me too. I just love it.

[00:06:14] Leslie Corbell: But you know, I'm kind of thrown by that fruit one I was, I kept, I kept remembering how important it was to put fruit or define fruit in your Christmas stocking. Mm-hmm. And how fruit was scarce. Yeah.

And so that's kind of the thinking I was going with. Yeah. Is that the fruit might've been scarce?

[00:06:29] Diane Matthews: Well, I'm thinking maybe berries and, uh, I thought just reading Well, yeah, that's true. The, it was called the, the corn that the Indians taught the pilgrims how to grow. They called it an Indian corn 'cause it wasn't the same corn that the, the pilgrims brought over with them to plant.

It was a different kind of corn. So that was interesting too. It was called Indian Indian corn. Very interesting. Very interesting. That was fun. Okay.

[00:06:54] Leslie Corbell: That was fun. Yeah. And

[00:06:54] Diane Matthews: so y'all can do that with your children. Change up the questions, but just kind of like a [00:07:00] fun questionnaire. Give them the answers, but let 'em choose.

You did great, Leslie. Thank you. You would. Thank you. So, traditions.

[00:07:07] Leslie Corbell: Yes, traditions. Everything that you do at Thanksgiving with your family is the start of a new tradition. That's right from the menu items to the activities. Everything becomes something your children and your family will look forward to every year.

Mm-hmm. So that's something to keep in mind. Mm-hmm. Because if you don't do it, your children will ask

[00:07:27] Diane Matthews: you. That's right. And then you mentioned something earlier about make sure you remember and write it down or because. Your children will ask

[00:07:36] Leslie Corbell: you about it. Yes. Yes. It's like, I'll say, okay, why? Where's the, yeah, where's the chocolate cake?

[00:07:42] Diane Matthews: Yeah. We, we had that last year. That's, you know, in their mind it's a tradition. Yeah. Yeah. So there's some ways to preserve the traditions. You can write 'em down. In a book. Mm-hmm. But one idea that my, my daughter came up with that would be tangible that you can keep, [00:08:00] she had some people coming over to her house for Thanksgiving that had never shared out loud what they were thankful for.

And so she was trying to make it more comfortable for them. So she. Got these really cute Thanksgiving place cards and she got some colored pens and had everybody write down what they were thankful for. And so after she had everybody write them down, she put 'em on the refrigerator and so everybody could read what everybody was thankful for.

But then I took it a little bit further. I thought, my goodness, you could decorate a bulletin board, take Polaroid pictures. You could do

[00:08:34] Leslie Corbell: a lot of keepsakes with that. Yeah. One thing that we did, and we did this last year. We have in the past years enjoyed making Christmas ornaments on Thanksgiving or the day after Thanksgiving.

And so what we did last year was kind of combine that and you know, those little tree slices, they're, we call 'em tree cookies and you can get 'em at Hobby Lobby. Mm-hmm. The ones we got had a little candy cane striped yarn tying them Christmas ornaments. Mm-hmm. And then we had [00:09:00] some colored markers and paint pens.

On each one. Everyone had as many as they wanted to do, but you wrote what you were thankful for. And so I put them on a garland this year, and so they wanna add to that.

[00:09:11] Diane Matthews: Oh, that's so cool. So you're gonna hang the garland.

[00:09:14] Leslie Corbell: The garland is hanging on on our stairs. Ornaments are on it. And so we're gonna add more this year.

So what

[00:09:19] Diane Matthews: a great way to just add them every. So perfect. Or you could even make it in a to a wreath. Yes. You know, you could do, you could be very creative. You know, the limit is your creativity. Yes.

[00:09:29] Leslie Corbell: And keep it simple. Yes. It doesn't have to require a lot of parts. You want it to be easy to do. Mm-hmm. People enjoy doing it not to be taxing or just something they can enjoy and talk over and make for you as a way to remember.

Thanksgiving remembering.

[00:09:44] Diane Matthews: Yes. And I think that's what Thanksgiving's all about, is remembering, remembering the blessings that God has blessed us with. So bountifully, there's so many things to be thankful for, but just to stop. Yes. And thank him for all the things [00:10:00] that we, you know, need to be thankful for.

Let's talk about some discipline tips that we have, or maybe just some planning tips for. Going into a Thanksgiving maybe season if you're traveling or you know, just the day for parents.

[00:10:16] Leslie Corbell: I think it's important to remember that. Children like routine and consistency. Mm-hmm. So this day is not like any other day, it's gonna have a lot of new people, perhaps.

Mm-hmm. Different foods, maybe a different home, some traveling involved. Or if you're at home, maybe people are coming into your home. So it's different. Maybe they didn't go to sleep on time. Just things can change. So just be mindful of that and understand that your child. Could be overwhelmed, could be tired, could be just overstimulated, just totally overstimulated.

Yes, completely. So that could affect your child's behavior. And so as long as you see their behavior through that lens mm-hmm. Of supporting them and encouraging them, giving them extra [00:11:00] instructions, clarifying expectations. I love what you have talked about with teaching your children how to meet new people.

That's not a skill

[00:11:09] Diane Matthews: that children just. Have, have automatically, no, they don't just get it from watching adults do it. And we didn't do it specifically for Thanksgiving, but I think this is a good time to start training and before Thanksgiving on how to greet people. And you can think for yourself what you want for your child, how you want them to greet people.

We thought it was real important for them to look adults in the eye and put their hand out. And we thought it was important too, to shake, you know, have a tight. Handshake, you know, just a firm handshake and look 'em in the eye and just say hello. And so we practiced that and we said that was very important.

And also what we thought was very important too, was if the TV's on break away from the TV and make sure that they're, they know that they're important and that they've arrived at the house or turn the TV off. If we knew we were having people over for [00:12:00] dinner, we'd have the TV off. But Thanksgiving's kind of rough because there's some football games that are really important.

So, you know, you might not be able to do that,

[00:12:06] Leslie Corbell: but just to teach them that. Yeah. And I think it's important to practice, like you're saying, practice before the day, before Thanksgiving. Set aside some time to practice with your child, these things. What is, what is it gonna look like? And even go so far as to have them watching something or have them in, involved in a game and then they break away from the game and come and greet you as you walk in.

So it, it's fun to practice and it helps them be more successful that day. That's right.

[00:12:33] Diane Matthews: And what's so nice now is you can put things on pause, so they're not gonna miss anything. If it is a game, I.

With your kids, did you make them try everything or

[00:12:46] Leslie Corbell: taste? It was never an issue for me. Mm-hmm. We had what we had. I didn't make special children's menu items, we just made our Thanksgiving foods. Mm-hmm. And it was just never really something we [00:13:00] discussed. It was just what was there. I've been very blessed 'cause they've never been picky eaters.

But I don't know if that was because of their nature. Their temperament was not to be picky about it or perhaps because it wasn't a big deal and that that was just the food that we had. And that's what everyone was eating. And if they tried some they did. If they didn't, they didn't try it. I didn't. Yeah, I didn't watch over it either way.

[00:13:21] Diane Matthews: Food was, um. A tricky issue for me. I did have an eating disorder, so I did not want to make it a big deal. So when we put food out the table, sure, eat it. Most of the time I had peanut butter and jelly. Some bread on the table. I wanted to make sure their bellies were full and they were satisfied before they got down from the table, um, or got down from the chairs.

But no, I did not, on a regular basis, did not make that a big deal. And so if Aunt Susie came over with a special dish and she wanted one of the kids to taste. That wasn't a big deal to me. I didn't make 'em taste it. It was like, oh, well, you know, [00:14:00] they have their plate. We'll just, you know, let 'em eat it. So no, I did not do that.

I would suggest that you don't just let them enjoy the day

[00:14:08] Leslie Corbell: and if they're hungry, they're going to eat. They're gonna eat what you have out there. So that's, it's a not ever been an issue

[00:14:14] Diane Matthews: and it's a special day. People kind of pick along the way. A couple of other suggestions we had here. Tell 'em some stories.

About Thanksgiving so that they're familiar with the Thanksgiving story. Mm-hmm. But thinking ahead before Thanksgiving day. If you know it's right in the middle of nap times, you may wanna ask 'em to shift the time a little bit. But if you can't let them eat and then maybe you can go into the back room and try to put the child down.

But if you can't, you could have a little quiet time back there and read a book with them, and at least let them rest for a little while.

[00:14:46] Leslie Corbell: Be prepared to soothe your child. That's right. To not be frustrated with their behavior if they do end up becoming overstimulated or overtired, but just to help them calm and understand where your child is coming from [00:15:00] and that they're doing the best they can with the skills they have on board for that day.

That's when we

[00:15:06] Diane Matthews: would say, stay calm.

[00:15:07] Leslie Corbell: Yes, yes.

[00:15:08] Diane Matthews: Just breathe and show compassion, empathy, and, and kindness. And try to solve the problems. Mm-hmm.

[00:15:16] Leslie Corbell: Yes. Instead of getting worked up, remember said, oh, you seem so tired right now. It's been a long day and we've been visiting with lots and lots of family.

[00:15:24] Diane Matthews: Mm-hmm.

Let's just

[00:15:25] Leslie Corbell: breathe together for a moment.

[00:15:26] Diane Matthews: Yeah.

[00:15:27] Leslie Corbell: Mommy's

[00:15:27] Diane Matthews: here. There's one other thing too, to prepare kids for if you're going to somebody else's house, aunt. Whatever may tap you on the head and pat your belly and give you squeezes, just, you know, let it happen. I know it's kind of unusual or awkward if it's new people you know that you don't know, so just prepare 'em for that too.

'cause that that's kind of weird, you know?

[00:15:49] Leslie Corbell: Well, and I think it empowers the child when you teach them how to greet people. Mm-hmm. It empowers them to then let them. Greet someone in a way that is comfortable to [00:16:00] them. Right. So let's, we can shake hands and greet. So I'm, because I, I think that is important too, to teach them Yeah.

If you greet them properly, maybe they won't do that. That's right. Yeah.

[00:16:12] Diane Matthews: Oh, yeah. Well, she great. So, and, and

[00:16:13] Leslie Corbell: then you read, also read a lot, you know, we've just had all these series on boundaries. Mm-hmm. And so if your child doesn't want to be padded on the belly or that it is okay. Mm-hmm. To say, may I shake your hand instead, you know, you know, kind of teaching those things.

'cause you want them to be able to assert that mm-hmm. As well. That's right.

[00:16:33] Diane Matthews: Yeah. In

[00:16:34] Leslie Corbell: a friendly, kind way.

[00:16:35] Diane Matthews: In a very friendly kind way. That's great advice, Leslie. So let's talk about some of our childhood traditions and then we'll move on to our traditions that we have now.

[00:16:46] Leslie Corbell: Yeah. So I just remember the foods that we had.

Mm-hmm. And I sat with my cousins. I got to see them. We usually had our own table where we sat growing up, and that was really fun. You know, we didn't pray as a family at our [00:17:00] Thanksgiving meals when I was growing up. And that's been something that has been important to me as an adult. Mm-hmm. And I didn't always feel very comfortable because it wasn't a skill that was taught or modeled or practiced at all in my childhood.

And so. My work around to kind of get more used to it was to be pray scripture. And I think anytime we pray God's words back to him is a wonderful moment. And so the one that I would typically do, and it's actually my birthday verse, so I like to think about finding a chapter and a verse number that corresponds with my birthday.

And so Lamentations three twenty three, and you can take a little bit of 22 and you can continue it on to 24, but it's primarily 3 23. When I paraphrase that and pray it back to God. It is your mercies are new every morning. Great. Is your faithfulness, Lord. Beautiful. And that's a beautiful Thanksgiving prayer.

That's right. So if you, if that's something that you're working with. Praying over the meal. It may be new to you. Mm-hmm. Maybe been a blessing to you all of your [00:18:00] family life. If not praying a verse and praying God's words back to him. That

[00:18:03] Diane Matthews: was the same way with us growing up in New Orleans. Our family did not pray.

Actually, our family, I was reminiscing because we were getting ready to do this and our family was, it was a crazy, huge, big. Everybody come. I was, I was telling you earlier that my dad would set up all these tables and it was like everybody was invited. We'd sometimes have like 50 people and I mean, it was just like this big, just, I don't know what to call it, but it was just, okay, it's time to dig in.

And then everybody, it was a big buffet and everybody would just eat and eat and eat and drink and drink and drink, and it would last for a long time, but no prayer. Later on in life, after. Hank and I got married and we had children. When we moved up here, my mom got sick. She was dealing with cancer and she couldn't cook anymore and she wanted so bad to have all the kids together.

So she [00:19:00] planned. My mom and dad planned for us to meet the family from New Orleans and then us from up in northwest Arkansas, meet in Memphis at this nice hotel, and we would stay there for like four days and we'd have Thanksgiving dinner. But the beauty of that was we decided. Hank would ask them if they wouldn't mind getting together in a big circle and read a scripture and go around and share what everybody was thankful for.

And we started with the youngest kids and we'd go up to the, to the grandparents. And some of the funny, cute things were, you know, we started with Daniel 'cause he was our youngest and, and I remember one time he said. He asked Jesus forgiven because he loved Buzz Lightyear more than more than Jesus. And he felt bad.

It was so cute. And then tractors and a little bit older and you know, it was just so beautiful. But they were so new at saying that it was just so raw and precious. And then by the time it got to [00:20:00] my mom and dad who were so foreign into any kind of experience like this, when Earl, my dad shared, I mean, there were tears coming out of everybody's eyes.

It was so sweet. So, um, that's how it started with my New Orleans family. And so when we are around them now, it's Hank, Diane, y'all pray. I mean, they just know it's standard. So

[00:20:19] Leslie Corbell: everyone had something mm-hmm. That they were thankful for and they were able to say that. Mm-hmm. In front of everyone. So that's really a sweet moment.

Now let's move to the food. Yes. The food. Yes. Favorite foods. So. What makes Thanksgiving? Thanksgiving for you as far food goes? Wow. Well, you know,

[00:20:43] Diane Matthews: I love Turkey. Like we said before, I love Turkey with the gravy, and I love cranberry sauce. I mean, that's so crazy. But I love my Turkey with my cranberry sauce.

But growing up it was always, I know this is gonna grow so many people out when I say this, but it was [00:21:00] oyster dressing and I had to get online and do some research about. In New Orleans, do most people eat oyster dressing or what kind of dressing? And it was half and half. Half the people do oyster dressing and half the people do cornbread dressing.

So I kinda have to have it all together. I

[00:21:18] Leslie Corbell: just can't do just one thing. What about you? I just wanna point out you share your favorite Thanksgiving thing with the original Thanksgiving with them having seafood and you having oyster dressing. So look at them. Look at their, that's so funny.

[00:21:30] Diane Matthews: Yes. Woo.

[00:21:33] Leslie Corbell: I have to go with two menu items.

Okay. One being. Cornbread dressing. Mm. Because we didn't do oyster dressing. Mm-hmm. We did cornbread dressing, and so there's always that science. It's just, it's just a loose science. Mm-hmm. Of the making your cornbread and putting that all together. And then how much stale white bread to add, just to get that perfect blend of moist, but not gummy because you can't have gummy dressing.

Mm-hmm. No. And then adding it in it, it [00:22:00] really is. You just wait for the moment. Okay. How's the dressing gonna turn out? You're eyeballing this. Salt your eyeball in the sage. 'cause you can't have too much sage. I know. So, yeah, just finding it. Who taught you? My mom. Okay. Your mom? My mom and her mom before her.

And so the, but my other favorite is Sweet potato Casserole. Yes. How can you go wrong with that? Okay. So do you fix it with pecans and marshmallows? No. Okay. Pecans and brown sugar. Okay. And butter mixture on top. Okay. Only no marshmallows. Okay. On our sweet potato casserole. How about you? Well, when we fix it, you know.

[00:22:36] Diane Matthews: I love Candy dms and it's just real gooey, but I try all the time. It was from my grandmother, Yola. I can't make it like her, but so Aunt Laura normally does it. She does the pecans and the marshmallows. Anyway, so delicious. So delicious love. I'm getting hungry. Okay. It's time to eat. We are, we are ready for Thanksgiving dinner.

So,

[00:22:57] Leslie Corbell: so delicious. So tell me about leftovers. [00:23:00] Well, leftovers, you know, that's the thing about it. 'cause we usually eat our Thanksgiving meal around one or two. Mm-hmm. And so, you know, about four or five o'clock, you're kind of wanting a little bit more. Mm-hmm. And we tend to start our leftovers. Even then, and I remember there was one year, the sweep again, the sweep potato of casserole is one of my family's big favorite.

We all love it. And so I try to make so much of it that we have it left for days. And there was a couple years ago where I had to actually make another sweep potato of casserole about two days later because we just hadn't gotten our feel of it.

[00:23:35] Diane Matthews: And did you still have Turkey? Yes. Oh, so you had to, yeah.

Yes. And so you had the other, so you had to keep going. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So before we end, what about desserts? Oh, pumpkin pie. Yeah. Pecan pie. Yes. Memaw chocolate cake. Memaw Chocolate. Yeah. That's our favorite. Yeah, we had the same pecan. And pumpkin. Yeah, definitely. Yeah. I'm ready for Thanksgiving right now.

I might have to go do something for [00:24:00] tonight. Sweet potatoes at least. Yeah, I dunno.

We really need to have a grateful heart and give thanks year round. So I think we

[00:24:16] Leslie Corbell: wanna close with the verse. We have Psalm 100, shout for joy to the Lord all the earth. Worship the Lord with gladness. Come before him with joyful songs. Know that the Lord is God. It is he who made us and we are His. We are his people.

The sheep of his pasture. Enter his gates with Thanksgiving and his courts with praise. Give thanks to him and praise his name. For the Lord is good, and his love endures forever. His faithfulness continues through all generations.

[00:24:54] Diane Matthews: Lord, we just thank you so much for this season that we can stop. [00:25:00] And really thank you for all the many blessings.

So thank you for this time, and it's in Jesus name we pray. Amen.

[00:25:09] Leslie Corbell: Thanks for listening. Check out our Instagram at the Mind of a Child Pod, or you can email us at the Mind of a Child Podcast at gmail com.